How my ADHD hides my autism

Watch next: How my Autism hides my ADHD https://youtu.be/nJ8fAfVevL8

Agonizing over tiny decisions but making impulsive huge life decisions is ME. I chose my degrees on a whim, I chose to move schools on an impulse…yet I spent five hours deciding what concealer I should buy. Thank you for this!

The more I associated with ADHD and learned about the traits that I identify with, the more I realized that many of my traits that seemed almost opposite of ADHD were actually autistic traits. I also struggle with the whole "am I extrovert or introvert?" question. I often have to tell people that I'm really quiet but once I get comfortable, I never shut up.

Loved this video. Today is my birthday, I’m 85 years old today 😢. It’s taken me 17 years to self diagnose, what a journey. Thanks so much for this. It makes me angry to realize how little help I’ve had😮

I am adhd and autistic. I got the adhd diagnosis at age 7 and started taking meds for it. Eventually around age 13 (puberty), my autism started to show and I got the diagnosis at 15. My mother kept saying “she is on a high dose of meds and there is still something else going on” and that’s what brought on the second diagnosis. When I take my adhd meds my autism shines through. However when I’m off my meds, the adhd covers up everything. It’s very interesting

I am diagnosed as autistic but I'm pretty sure I also have ADHD. I would describe this AuDHD experience as having a 1000 tabs open in your mind, of which 50% are dedicated to manually processing every social detail.

The start described my childhood and adolescence perfectly. Please do an Autism hides ADHD one too!

I just got diagnosed with ADHD at the end of 2023 at 33 years of age. Before that, I was just considered an “overly sensitive worry wart” with severe anxiety and depression (and also two bouts of PPD). Adderall has totally changed my life and I feel like my brain is quiet for the first time in my existence. It’s been a grieving process to look back over my life and seeing all the places that I struggled and suffered without knowing what was wrong with me. I’ve always felt different. I’ve always felt like I have this “internal world” that is rich and full and complex that no one else can see or understand. I’m very good at mimicry, and I’ve always watched people closely. I’ve honed therapeutic communication to a T, and I’ve crafted myself into a generally likable person. Over the past year or so, I’ve been trying to figure myself out. What parts of me are ME, and what parts are a mask I’ve created to cover parts I’m embarrassed about? I think I mask far more than I ever realized and that makes me feel both proud of myself and sad at this disingenuous approach to life. The ADHD diagnoses has been immeasurably helpful in understanding myself, and I’m trying to give myself permission to explore and name the things I struggle with instead of saying “oh that doesn’t bother me,” or “I can do that.” I’m quite sure I’ve also got high-masking autism. I’d like to get evaluated if I can figure out a place. Did anyone else not really notice their adhd/tism until after having children? When I had my first nearly 5 years ago, I felt my brain and body screech to a stop with a thud and a bang. It’s like the exhaustion of motherhood broke my brain and it never really recovered. Meds and therapy help a lot, but I’d love to hear if anyone else really noticed their struggle after kids. Thank you for reading my novel lol

On how autism hides ADHD...I recently went to a panel on ADHD where all members had ADHD and it was predictably raucous and completely disorganized, which to my autistic side was a lot to take in, but when I listened to the CONTENT of what the ADHD folks said in describing their inner experiences it was totally relatable! The outward presentation of people who only have ADHD is pretty alien to me but the inner experiences are really very very similar! (I recognize that the ADHD traits at the panel were probably exaggerated because of performance anxiety and the excitement of getting together with a bunch of other ADHD folks). Anyhow that was my recent revelation of how autism masks ADHD in audhders!

I think you've hit the nail on the head with this one. My autism hides my ADHD and my ADHD hides my autism. Which is why when I warch videos of people with one or the other diagnosis, I only partly relate but if I watch any videos of people with both, it's like watching a carbon copy of me. I can be intense and spontaneous and jump around from obsession to obsession. But I have a big, big need to know what is happening next and when in as much advance as possible so that I can adjust myself to the idea beforehand. Unless it was something I came up with then it xan be somewhat spontaneous. I thrive on routines but I have to have some measured level of variety because I will get bored easily. It feels like one side of my brain is like "You should totally be a famous Broadway star or sing Opera or something" and the other is like "No, nope. Stay in the house where you can keep everything just how you like it and never have to talk to strangers." The ADHD side wants attention and drama and excitement. The autism side wants a cozy house with quiet and simple routines. It's like the two are at war. All. The. Time.

As I've found with other people with the dual diagnosis, listening to this is like hearing from a "brain twin". I mean to like 95% similarity. It could almost be a description of me. I was unsure about my ADHD diagnosis until I came across other AuDHD people. I'm going to suggest this video to people who I think need to know how my brain works!

I think having both makes it so hard to get a diagnosis for either because they can compliment eachother. You learn how to use to "positive" of each side in the correct situation, so you're able to manage in society, but the struggle is always still there, yet so hard to diagnose 😞

Very relatable. I've felt and have long described myself/personality as "a series of contradictions". Before I started considering that I may have both, I'd watch ADHD stuff and kinda relate, then autism stuff and kinda relate, but when I found out about "AuDHD" my mind was blown. I'm in my 30s and undiagnosed, I've just been information binging about both. I've felt different from others from a young age, I may have found my answer as to why. Thank you and other autistic/ADHD people for putting this out there. If I'm correct and I have both, it would make a lot of sense of many things for me and I believe they mask each other, particularly when I was a kid.

I started writing a comment here at least half a dozen times.. but honestly I relate to absolutely everything you are talking about, the non-stop brain train, the adhd masking the autism, the enormous amount of effort, the originally extremely quiet person to now the never shut up person, the stimming/fidgeting that absolutely brings comfort more than focus... these 2 conditions constantly pull against each other and never really know which one will be more difficult on a particular day/time

This is interesting. My ADHD presents itself in a much more disorganized, internalized way. I have some impulsivity, but most of my more "problematic" issues that I associate with my ADHD are related to disorganization, executive functioning, problems with memory, etc, not so much impulsivity. I'm not loud and chatty and novelty seeking. I was diagnosed with ADHD at age 16 and autism at age 35. I do find that a part of me loves lists and structure, but another part of me gets very bored and distracted very quickly with the routine, which is where the ADHD comes into play.

Psychedelics are just an exceptional mental health breakthrough. It's quite fascinating how effective they are against depression and anxiety. Saved my life.

Timestamps 0:00 - Intro 2:06 - Talkativeness 6:51 - Nonstop brain train 9:23 - Impulsivity

My personal AuDHD theory is that, with small decisions, it seems like there is a right/rational option and a wrong/irrational one. I often get stuck on whether I have considered all the relevant criteria to make my decision regarding towels, wall decorations etc. Whereas with big life-altering choices, I realise there's no way to know beforehand if you're choosing wisely. That, combined with a love of novelty or sense of urgency (now-or-never-type situation) compels me decide on the big things in the moment.

I'm autistic (no ADHD diagnosis), but a lot of this resonated with me. Especially the decision making/impulsivity. I've described my big life decisions as like earthquakes before. It's like pressure gradually builds up, and then there's a massive shift. I'm vaguely dissatisfied for a year and then I'm suddenly saying "I'm moving to a new city and leaving my job". Got to say, my drastic changes have all been good for me so far - no regrets.

Yes! The ADHD novelty seeking put you in a broader range of situations which allowed you to mask more convincingly in a broader range of situations and be more adaptable; I've never heard AuDHD expressed in such a neat, concise way - thank you!