Can You Tell If Someone has Autism? | Middle Ground

Unreleased prompt andthe extended cut is up on our Patreon 👉 www.patreon.com/jubileemedia “It’s harder for autistic people to get a job

“i wanted to be with the neurotypical people but like Ariel i couldn’t talk” i like verbally gasped that was such a beautiful metaphor

If only all middle ground episodes were so grounded and respectful

I really appreciate Ian's honesty during the "I have looked down on someone for being autistic" segment. Recognizing and addressing your own biases (which we all have at some point or another) is important for breaking down those barriers between people. ❤

Abbey articulates herself beautifully, and it’s clear that she’s worked hard in her therapies to be able to do so. Abbey having to ask Christine if it was okay to share the “Ariel story” and the response was almost hesitant like “well, you can” and then what she said really resonated with the other guests— I wish Christine would let her speak for herself more.

Abbey’s mom irritated me this entire video. As someone who was diagnosed at 18, she made me feel extremely invalidated and her comment about how 35 year olds shouldn’t seek out a diagnosis because they’re successful is so damaging and disheartening. Autistic people deserve to know that they’re autistic and deserve help and accommodations at any age.

47:29 "hey abbey, what do you think your strengths are?" was such a refreshing moment-- adin addressing abbey specifically and not her mom, and bringing the conversation back to how abbey herself interprets her autism (and not how her mom tells her to interpret it) was such a relief, and such a clear moment of compassion and empathy on adin's part.

It made me really sad that abby was not going to ageee with the prompt that its better for autistic people to date within the community but walked forward when her mom did. Her mom just totally spoke for her and also then abbys reaction to her mom saying she wouldnt be comfortable with abby dating someone nerotypical and abbys reaction to that. Honeslty it felt like her mom was implying someone who is nurotypical dating her would be almost taking advantage of her felt really gross. Someone does not need to be autistic to be able to relate, understand, care for and love someone who is austistic. I would have loved to hear what abbys actual feelings about it were.

Abbey is autistic but also has an intellectual disability. Her mother doesn't seem to realize those are separate diagnoses. You do not need to have an ID in order to be autistic. ASD is a neurotype that impacts the way we perceive and experience the world and society. I sailed through my academics without trying before college. I didn't need more than a year of speech. I had no iep. At the same time, the world has always been too bright, smelly, and loud. I didn't understand social hierarchy. I never maintained more than one friend at a time. I spent most of my time inside my own head. Some of my earliest memories are of not understanding humans because my brain is neurodivergent and I have always thought differently. If you listen to any of Abbey's mum's videoes she talks proudly about training autistic traits out of Abbey.

I can’t believe a random participant had to redirect and ask Abbey her strengths after her literal mom pointed out her “deficits”😭

Abbey is so much more capable than her mom gives her credit for.

Can’t finish. Abbeys mother shouldn’t have been invited. Abbey can manage this!!! She was doing well!

Wow, Abby stepping forward because she agrees that she finds the term 'disabled' offensive and her mom telling her "I think you should go back there." And Abby does it. I feel so sorry for Abby to have such a controlling mother that doesn't let her think and speak for herself, undermines her agency and disregards her boundaries. Abby obviously finds the term 'disabled' offensive and her mother keeps calling her that. I wish Abby the strength to emancipate herself from her mother and find other people to rely on who treat her with respect.

I wish Adin had more friends. He seems so genuine and funny. He also kinda stuck up for Abby at the end there when her mom was going on about negative things and he asked Abby directly what her super powers were to give her a chance to speak positively about herself. Very considerate.

I noticed that underneath their names some people had "autistic" and others had "has autism" and I just really appreciate that those people on the show were able to choose what language they'd prefer for themselves as opposed to the show assuming what they'd be more comfortable with :)

abbey's mom gatekeeping autism from lower/moderate support needs autistics is so shitty. mindsets like that is why as a low to moderate support needs autistic person myself, i had so much trouble getting accommodations. because i was able to mask and make myself appear put together screwed me over. i hate this idea that because you can travel, have a job, drive, go to school that you can not be autistic or you don't need accommodations.

When Adin asked Abbey what she thought her strengths were, it honestly made me emotional. It was such a beautiful moment of empathy and compassion, and you could tell how happy it made her to say so many positive things about herself. This is just my opinion, but I really think Abbey's mother needs to pay more attention to how Abbey feels in the moment, especially since communication has been a challenge for her. I just feel like there were times when Abbey had things she wanted to say but was struggling to find a way to do so. There were also a few times when it looked like Abbey was looking to her mother for what to do after a prompt was said, and it kind of rubbed me the wrong way, but I could have misread that. (also we need an Adin and Abbey collab duet immediately!!!!)

I love Abbey explaining her autism through the little mermaid, she articulated that so well

As a high masking autistic woman, I was pretty disappointed to see Abbey’s mom invalidate the experiences of high masking autistics as a grab for attention. Getting a diagnosis as an adult helped me finally have some compassion for everything I went through as a child, and it has helped me advocate for myself in all aspects of my life. High masking autistics aren’t a threat to others on the spectrum, and we still benefit from the diagnosis, even if it looks different.

Abbie’s situation is difficult. watch how she watches her mom on how to respond. It’s not clear whether she has developed self governance based off of what her mom says because she’s been infantilized, or if as a part of her learning disability she doesn’t know how to respond based on what her opinions are and is relying on her mother to help her do that. in many ways that may also be the product of 20 years of her mom being that same support system and necessary guidance that got her to where she is today. It’s important to note that crashes and meltdowns for grade 2+ can result in digression of speech patterns, habit formation, masking and etc, so it’s not as simple as just set Abbie free to the wind and let her explore on her own. In cases where they aren’t able to be fully independent or self-sufficient, you have to develop very strategic contingency plans with small incremental goals towards that. Her mom clearly has given her life to her and has a strong sense of protection for her daughter, but its unclear whether it has contributed to Abbie being able to express her own feelings when she does feel fit..