Hidden Signs of Borderline Personality Disorder

Guilty of apologizing a lot, I feel like I will never be able to repay the people that help me everyday and it almost haunts me.

Everyone in the comments is diagnosing themselves with BPD

Videos like these are in dire need of some sort of disclaimer that explains this is not a diagnostic tool, people without disorders experience these things from time to time, and that these are a few personal accounts from those who want to share their story or something like that. The comments all over the Facebook post of this video show what kind of confusion, invalidation, and frustration vague statements like this has been leading to. The mighty is supposed to represent people with disorders, and this is simply not a good representation, and it isn't the first video or post that I've seen that needs some serious reconsideration.

Im not diagnosed with BPD but all of this, EVERYTHING is relatable...

Don't use this to self-diagnose yourself. Literally everybody has done most of these things at certain points in their lives and probably has done them multiple times. If it is persistent behavior then you need to go to a therapist or psychiatrist so that they can make a proper diagnosis. You are most likely completely normal and suffer from depression and low self-esteem, which most people have issues with at some point in their adolescence or early adulthood.

Teenagers are just going to use this to diagnose themselves with borderline personality disorder. To everyone watching: it's very common to find that you have some or many symptoms of a personality disorder. This does NOT mean you have the disorder. You should never diagnose yourself. If you actually believe you may have a disorder, go get professionally diagnosed as these issues are very serious and debilitating

I dated a borderline woman for 4 years. I knew something was off but never to the point of driving me away permanently. I learned about cluster B personality disorders after the brutal discard. I had no idea what happened. I thought I was just really patient but after learning that they view and react to the world on a childlike level it began to make sense. I teach grade school so I was used to dealing with problem children and their transgressions so dating a someone with BPD never really bothered me as it would do most. I always saw her childlike behavior the same way I viewed my students, “if I keep showing what healthy love and a healthy relationship looks like, they’ll someday grow up”. I was wrong, they cannot grow up without therapy. I was Devastated in the end because I could have done things differently if I had only known. This video almost made me cry because now I feel insanely guilty for not hearing her cries for help. If I had known then what I know now I could have help her. All her relationships before me were 6-12 months, we went 4 years. I take that as a point of pride in myself that I did good works in her life. I may never talk to her again but I will always carry the guilt of missing the signs. If I had only knew soon 😢

I am almost 53 years old, and I had a nightmarish, abusive and violent childhood. I grew up in a crazy, angry household, where every reaction to every single thing was magnified, and where there were no rational thought patterns or any discernible regulation of emotions. No emotional discipline at all. This learnt behaviour, from the violent parent in particular, denied me the tools with which to regulate my emotional responses and behaviour. And this has pretty much held me back all my life. Suffice it to say, I have been alone all my life and have no children. I cannot hold onto friendships and have a very distant, fractious relationship with my family. I also have trouble keeping a job. However, I have only recently been diagnosed with Emotionally Unstable Personality Disorder, or, EID - Emotional Intensity Disorder - which is the term I much prefer. So I can relate to quite a few of the symptoms in the video, such as apologising all the time, feeling that nobody wants me around, my emotions spiralling out of control because I haven't yet got the mental and emotional distancing and challenging skills to calm myself down in time, and extreme self criticism and loathing. I also have clinical depression on top of this, or perhaps as a symptom of it, which means I am in a seemingly constant state of limbo or flux, where I can't reconcile myself as ever being a valued part of the world, and I have no appetite for life whatsoever. I'm not really living, just existing. I am currently doing an intensive group therapy STEPPS course, which helps you to manage your emotions from spiralling, to recognise the unhelpful and long established thought filters that can trigger those extreme emotional responses. I am on my sixth week - just two hours a week but, trust me, it's enough - and although it's hard work, and we get homework as well, it's quite empowering in that it's making us feel responsible for our own healing and emotional management. Personality disorders can't be cured - they're far too entrenched in a person's psyche - but they can be managed. It's early days yet, as there are 20 sessions in this course. Over the last 20 years or so I have had all kinds of therapy - 1-2-1 talking therapy, CBT - Cognitive Behavioural Therapy - but nothing has worked because it was just skimming the surface. But now, with this intensive and very specifically structured group therapy, I feel that I may be getting somewhere. Maybe. Like I said, it's early days. But one thing I do know for sure, and that the whole group can agree on, is that we are not alone with this. And that is somewhat reassuring. For now anyway.

I have all of these but I don't have bpd...

being borderline is hell, endless punishment.

I have BPD and watching the video hit close to home. As to everyone in the comments, these are not BPD exclusive things. Many people feel these all the time despite whether or not they have BPD, however they are most common if you do have BPD and they are INCREDIBLY strong feelings. It's something that seems like the biggest issue in the world. That's where the difference is.

EVERYONE has experienced some bpd symptoms to an extent. however, when it affects everything you do/your functioning in society, that's when it's diagnosable as bpd

I was diagnosed almost a year ago with BPD, I also suffer from bipolar disorder, PTSD, depression, and anxiety, and I can say alot of this for me is true but they are complete and utter blanket statements. Everyone feels these things. I hate stuff like this. Its going to make everyone think they have the disorder just because they feel these things when in reality everyone does at some point. You can't put blanket statements over a serious mental illness like this.

lol my mother has bpd and she does almost none of these. it doesn't effect everyone the same and it ruins lives, please stop diagnosing yourselves it's insulting.

Been diagnosed for 3 years now, and it's been hard to cope, but a little easier now that I know I'm not alone. I am embarrassed and became a true introvert due to it, as it's so easy for me to cry in front of people over things that aren't just stressful or scary. Just someone giving me a compliment, seeing a cute baby/animal, or just experiencing something heartwarming, will my my eyes tear and I start to sniffle. I just hope maybe one day, the sharp, loud feelings will simmer down. It hurts to be passionate.

I have BPD and I'm working really hard on my self awareness and how I affect others but what some people don't understand is how they affect people like me. We experience things so much more intensely and the common invalidation that most people can handle and brush off easily hurts us so bad and stay with us for much longer.

"I self-sabotage everything. Things could begoing well, butI find a way to destroy it." I'm only three in and this one hurts the most.

everything in this video was so relatable to me. after I watched this,I can already tell you that I'm actually suffering from this BPD here. it's really hard for me sometimes. I find it really hard to trust some people,always apologizing like all the time and I just couldn't help myself but to keep everything that I actually feel on the inside rather than to talk to somebody about it.... this really hurts me so much🥺😔

I was recently diagnosed with it and ALL of this descibes me. While it does explain my personality and my behavior over the last 20 years or so (im only 33), it is still hard for people to understand it. I told one of my best friends about it and she said to not "use it as a excuse" and that its "the same as bipolar" which it is not. I am often also told to "knock it off" or "calm down". Those dont help and just are very hurtful.

Even if you can relate to a lot of these things, it is okay to speculate (is that the right word?) that you might have this disorder, but never just assume you have the disorder just because you have the symptomes. Get a proffesional to figure that out. Don't say you have a disorder when you're not 100% sure. It's an insult to people who actually have the disorder.