I'm Tired of Trying and Failing

Mental exhaustion is the worst - not having the mental "spark" she's talking about is often a result of burnout and comparing yourself to your past successes. There was a period where I didn't heal my physical health nor my mental health. Take the time you need because not everyone is the same

Totally understand the frustration with knowing I'm intelligent but not being able to do "mundane" adulting things like "normal" people. That question keeps popping up: "What is WRONG with me?" Turns out ADHD, diagnosed in my late 40s. We feel you, Julia! We're rooting for you!

You can tell her mind goes at a million miles an hour. Really feel for her 😔

There are MANY bad health professionals, in America included. I've gone through 8 therapists from different places and they have all ranged from unhelpful to traumatizing. It's really upsetting.

Something I learned: if it makes you uncomfortable, you are growing & learning. One of the toughest things for me to do is to sit alone with my thoughts with no external stimulation; I feel like I am going mad. Triumph over this, MAKE yourself uncomfortable and things will change. Learn to process your emotions; don't let them bottle up or they will drain you later. See what you are feeling, focus on the feeling, not why it's there. Do NOT think about it. Feel it, acknowledge it, respect it, but don't let it take over. If you place the emotions in front of you, they cannot overwhelm you. Focus on the feeling, not thoughts; thinking is what led you here.

Dr. K: “Slow down, you don’t have to fix everything today. How does that sound to you?” Julia: anxiety intensifies Dr. K: challenge accepted smile I really feel for Julia, sounds like she hasn’t had the perspective of someone who’s felt at peace before. I really hope she finds the resources she needs, a brain that works that quickly will be great when she can manage to channel it positively. Big hugs 🫂

She talks like I do when I’m overwhelmed but she’s eloquent and I’m just word vomit. She explained what I’ve felt a lot and what I’ve tried to get help for. I have diagnosed ADHD and even with that it’s a struggle to get help for it as an adult since I used to have that spark to do things as a child/teen. I still get told I need to just try harder. I think for me, I’ve tried slowing down but the world keeps moving quickly and it’s dragging me along. If I don’t keep up I’ll wind up homeless. If it weren’t for support from my family I probably already would be.

I've never heard someone say "I'm loading." Loved that :D

This was HIGHLY relatble, I hope Julia gets the Help she needs, good luck, stay strong!

I think this is a classic case of “don’t try the same thing over and over if it hasn’t worked in the past”. Slow process is better than 10 steps forward + 10 steps back

This is exactly what I'm going through. 24 with ADHD & Dsythmia, living in a toxic home environment, and just trying to get my independence. Its been over a year since graduation and I've failed my 4 main goals: making a solid routine, finding a steady career position, saving money to move out, and working out consistently. I have so many areas of my life I want to improve, but I am constantly overwhelmed and just keep continuing the shame cycle like Dr.K described. And just like he said; the answer was unsatisfying, and even made me a bit angry. Ive been in therapy for years, and am already medicated for my ADHD yet the cycle continues. So the answer is...? - Stop shaming yourself - Be patient with yourself - Fix the holes in the ship before trying to sail far Am I missing something? I feel like this isn't sinking in right.

13 minutes in, and I gotta say, Julia really makes some comments that hit hard for me. I'm a 31 year old man who 100% believes he has ASD (would have been diagnosed as aspergers in the past) but was never diagnosed with that because instead my childhood diagnosis was dyspraxia (which I will boldly proclaim was 100% the wrong diagnosis). The struggles I've gone through in life because I never had the proper care, the proper guidance, the proper role models, the proper lessons taught to me... Even to this day, there's still a hell of a lot I've got to learn, and there's still mental barriers that I just can't let go of. Things I can say to other people but find impossible to even tell myself, let alone genuinely believe about myself. I feel for her, and I'll give the entire video a rewatch, but I feel like just saying something right now. Julia... hang in there, because I have hope that you'll manage to make it. I want you to grow and to achieve better, I hope we all can. And not only that, I want you to remember something: You've done what a lot of people can't; reaching out to someone who CAN help. That's already a huge step. You got this.

I'm tired too. I just keep trying because there's nothing else to do anyway, and not because of some proud "I'll never give up" mentality. Failure is expected, it is the norm actually. I don't need positivity, I need results.

She sounds very smart albeit just overthinking a lot of stuff. It gets the best of us. Also, embrace the awkwardness, its going to happen either way.

My wife and I are trying to run our own business while also supporting each other and our 2 kids and I feel this entire video on so many levels. We are both struggling so much to make any money, we aren’t finding support in our community so we aren’t getting help there (whether financial or just friends to talk to), and honestly just finding it hard to see how to get out of this situation and actually get our feet back under us.

I really feel for her. I am also from eastern Europe and to get proper psychiatric help here is very difficult. I had the same experiences with 'mental health professionals'. Many are rude and very unprofessional or neglectful. The one's given by the state just prescribes you expensive medication and tell you to come back in 2 months. To find a good one it's very rare and covid made it even harder, because now the number of patients skyrocketed.

Just listening to someone saying slow down or be patient makes me cry and relieved at the same time. Needed to hear that.

I’m tired of being scared to try.

This person is really emotionally intelligent, I wish her the best ❤

Time stamp 19:47. "You start by stopping." Resonant. Appreciative of this conversation-- and the sensitive, validating, but constructive, objective, open, reflective...and ultimately patient delivery of the recommendations. Very perspective opening.