If You Struggle With Limerence, Here Is How You Start The Healing Process

I've started telling myself that reaching out to people after they've shown they don't want me is a form of self-injurious behavior and that has helped me a lot.

Never make someone a priority when they consider you just an option

Wow that hit home: you're not gonna get closure. Closure is a fake word when you're addicted to somebody. Thank you.

Limerence is like "pouring cement into the engine of your life." That's excellent. That's EXACTLY what it is.

Rumi is helping me a lot saying :"our task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it."

I stopped believing in twin flames & soulmates relationship when I started healing especially since ALL of my relationships (platonic & romantic) were marinated in limerence.

Limerence can be so soul crushing. Personally, it is stronger than any other emotion I can experience. I’ve had a death in the family + putting down my cat today, yet the limerence for my ex is STILL stronger. I hate that 😢

Limerance is why I can't have casual sex 😂😂 I'll just turn around and think I'm in love with them despite it all

I had massive crushes on celebrities and I spent a lot of time in fantasy world. When I married, I was disappointed that I wasn't fixed automatically. It was a huge problem in our marriage that I had such expectations. Fortunately, he stayed with me and we are very blessed at 35 years together.

"It is profoundly healing to be loved by someone who is committed to you"; hearing this put tears in my eyes. I am attempting to heal from my husband cheating on me, I often fantasize about beeing with someone faithful who loves me...

I just realised I don't have boundaries. I thought I did - because I say what they are. But I don't actually walk away when they're crossed. D'oh!

Id say don’t specifically say I don’t want to have casual sex because I’ll get hurt and swap that to I don’t have casual sex. Period. No bargaining. Take it or leave it.

Limerance made things so difficult for me. Even now. I lived with that and Maladaptive daydreaming. Also irrational fear of abandonment. I will beat it. I beat it.

Long time viewer/listener, but I rarely comment … let me just say this entire video contained more advice and better surrogate parenting than I’ve ever received in my entire life, collectively. Thank you so so much, friend 🙏🏼🧡

I'm a person who rarely comments on a video. I can't believe what I'm hearing. This almost feels like being unplugged from the Matrix by having a plug pulled out of your neck. This kind of awakening reminds me of learning about coming from a family of Narcissism for the first time. A co-dependent with narcissistic traits here, been hooked and crushing on unavailable wanna-be-straight guys my whole life and more often than not - being taken advantage of. My textbook covert narcissistic ex devastated me to the point that I should have been dead by now. He was all I could ever dream of and more. Dude stole my whole identity and gave me in exchange pure disgust, self-hatered and unbearable guilt that almost drove me to suicide. Absolute nightmare. A hole in a soul. A lifetime of masturbation and overeating. Swear to God I won't ever truly trust another guy right from the start. Run for the hills when you see red flags. Limerance is a very dangerous phenomenon that promises you salvation and than devastates your life until you become an emotional wreck with very high chances of leaving the planet by suicide. Drugs? Sniffing and smoking? Been there, done that. Believe me, substance addiction is nothing compared to this. These are cravings impossible to describe. People simply don't understand how addictive this is. No logical arguments will ever get to you. Your whole living becomes a means to an end with an only goal to revolve around just that - if you call that a life. Try it once and you're fucked for life. Limerance is a hell of a drug.

I just noticed the relationship of the word "limerence" to the words "limit" and "limbo". The root of the second two words means "border". I think this is where we live but really hold ourselves back from real, connected relationships that go nowhere, because they aren't really seeing the other person, or ourselves. We are "limiting" ourselves to living in "limbo".

Nearly cried with Connie’s letter bc that’s exactly what I’ve struggled with the majority of my adult life, I feel like I’m not alone

The worst part is when you’ve physically experienced that great love though and it wasn’t just in your imagination. This person broke up with me and they said they just fell out and even they had no reason, that I was a great girlfriend but something inside them changed. They’re still with me in my everyday life and I fear losing them and the limerence is strong.

I healed it. But with me,, the guys were Interested TIL I SET BOUNDARIES. And took me time to realize they were wrong for me. Anyone who wants to negotiate my boundaries, act like i m overreacting,, they NOT Worth it. I know this now. I had to choose between my boundaries or having a relationship. I healed my obsession long story short.

I have always struggled with limerance, I didn't know it's name. Thank you for this education. I'll try to defeat it and be more normal.