How recruiters are in each branch of the military once they get you in their office.

"we prepare the fuck outta you to be homeless as shit" im so done.. semper fi bitches!

Space Force recruiter: "Want to be Master Chief?"

This was great. As an Air Force vet myself, I about died laughing when they slapped his hand away and gave him an unsolvable test problem. That's exactly how it was.

Before I joined the Army I went to an Air Force recruiter. I sat in the office for an hour and nobody there said a word to me. I escorted myself out. That is my villain's origin story.

I wanted to be in the Marines but my parents are still married.

Army: Got yo' ass now 😈 Navy: Got yo' ass now 😊

Damn people are still coming here to see this video 🙏🏽🙏🏽

Homeless as shit.. but you'll still be a marine. Lol

Coast Guard recruiter: "Wait, you're actually interested?"

g o t y o a s s n o w

Airman here. 1. If the mother of all bombs with 11 tons of TNT, how big would the blast radius be if it was dropped from Jesus' doorstep? As far as I know, the Bible doesn't specify the altitude of Jesus' doorstep, so I have to assume it starts where the atmosphere stops: The Karman line (~300,000 feet). Assuming the pilot had a billet in literally heaven, the bomb would fall from 100km. The thing is, the bomb would reach terminal velocity after about 12,417 feet of free fall, so the extra altitude wouldn't affect the blast radius much... Therefore, the MOAB has a blast radius of about 1 mile. 2. If a fighter jet is flying 400pmh from Dallas to Memphis, how many rounds of golf can one Airman play in that allotted time? First, we must convert 400mph to knots, which is 348 knots. Dallas is about 375 nautical miles from Memphis. At a cruising altitude of 20,000 feet, it would take about an hour to get there. However, we must calculate that the pilot stopped for lunch, which adds another 1.5 hours. In total, it would take 2.5 hours. Considering a round of golf takes about 4.5 hours, the Airman would sadly only have time for 0.56 rounds of golf.

I'm preparing to "try" and get into the airforce, and I kid you not, the recruiter was playing with a football while telling me: "We have a huge diversity of jobs, but there's also a lot of time to get a slot open for you...that being said...we are mostly full, why do we need you? If anything, you can go to the army". The guy was not an asshole by no means but that was...a weird experience.

You know you go to a ghetto high school if the Air Force don't show up to the job fair in the cafeteria but yet Army and Marines got 2 booths. One inside and the other next to your personal vechicle.

“Here in the marines we have all you can eat crayons” Marines: Mouth watering

My Air Force recruiter was great and kept it real. No lies actually. I think she actually helped me graduate from H.S. as I was failing several classes and somehow got by with a bunch of D- grades when I did like 10% of the work. They knew I was joining and back in the day, that was a noble thing for a young man to do, so no one wanted to hinder you...even if it meant letting you squeak by. My recruiter took me and this girl to an amusement park and let us be. Basic training was easy. The level of responsibility was awesome. I was 19 years old and working alone on a multi-million dollar mainframe computer. I had to make it happen by myself and I did. 20 happy years later and I retired. We all have choices to make....you want to be a Marine? Go on Devil Dog. I applaud you. I didn't want to eat dirt and ask for seconds. I wanted my AirCon and restful sleeps.

I worked with a guy who was set to go in the army. they were going to make him a truck driver. the man did triathlons for fun. he stopped doing marathons because they bored him. he would carry extra weights in a backpack at work all day just to make things challenging. finally I had to tell him "as much as this pains an old sailor to say...have you talked to the marines? because everything you are doing right now is kinda what the marines DO." he's still a marine. he's one of those guys who loves every minute of it so much that other marines tell him to knock it off.

"We do prepare the fuck out of you to be homeless as shit" I'm fucking crying

The Navy : 100 men go in and 50 couples come out

When I was in the Army I attended several technical schools with Navy and Air Force service members. The Navy technicians were consistently the best across the board; always in the top percentile. Air Force technicians were average, at best. And, Army technicians ran the gamut: The top students and the bottom student were often from the Army.

As a former sailor I am personally offended while simultaneously can't stop laughing 🤣