Dr. Shefali Discusses New Parenting Methods | Oprah's Super Soul | OWN Podcasts

"You thought that you were here to raise your child, but your child is coming to help raise you."

If Eckhart Tolle wrote a parenting book this would be it. She embodies the "be present" motto in parenting. I love it. Yes!

I just cried listening coz I realised what I was doing wrong. And Now I can correct it. Thabk you for investing in my daughter by educating me with your knowledge.

My husband has always been the parent in your book more times than me & we finally have the words to express our desired parenting that still aligns with our Godly lifestyle. Less of us more of Him❤

This should have millions of views and shares. Such a revolutionary message for all parents and would-be parents out there! ✨

This entire conversation reminded me of one of my favorite poems by Kahlil Gibran: ".....Your children are not your children. They are the sons and daughters of Life’s longing for itself. They come through you but not from you, And though they are with you yet they belong not to you. You may give them your love but not your thoughts, For they have their own thoughts. You may house their bodies but not their souls, For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams. You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you. For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday. You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth. The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite, and He bends you with His might that His arrows may go swift and far. Let your bending in the archer’s hand be for gladness; For even as He loves the arrow that flies, so He loves also the bow that is stable." Parents harm their children when they have them without first working on themselves and doing the inner work it takes to heal their childhood traumas, and when they persist with God-like controlling behaviours throughout the entire parent-child dynamic of their relationship- even when their children have become adults. I agree that most people, if they are honest with themselves, have children because of the ego and not having enough self-awareness to dissect and unpack those "I" statements that feed into the ego without ever even contemplating if they are ready for the task of raising children or how best to. I also agree (even without having children) that thinking of parents as guides-and not "mini-gods"- would be a more beneficial foundation and premise for positive techniques in parenting. This approach should be common (sense) and not ground-breaking. Perhaps if parents saw children as their own unique beings/souls to nurture (expand) instead of extensions of themselves to rein in (diminish) and be controlled or even punished, it would be.

Conscious parenting is not just about raising children..It is about raising humanity .When we understand it´s profound and powerful principles , we heal not only our own past wounds ,but those of others around us. Such is the tremendous restorative potential of this work: it has the capacity to transform trauma into health .

I raised my daughter very consciously. I have a whole different philosophy on parenting as well and this sounds similar to it my daughter 17 and I have had lots of proof that I did the right thing mutual respect, mutual love and not authoritarian.

I remember what Sadhguru said that stayed with me forever. "We don't raise our children. We raise cows and pigs,etc. We cultivate children." I love that this book goes in depth about this.

Emm Oprah was the mother we never had. I was aware at 14yrs of age, emotionally divorcing my parents even in the African context. I became a warrior in my life, & have spent my life using conscious parenting to myself, in serving the world. Bringing light to what happened to us as a human being, & forgiving the past, to still my spirit, rest, relax & disappoint my family, community, society & humanity, to become free. Thank you Dr.Shefali & Oprah for confirming my spirit💜. Merry Christmas & Happy epic New Year 2024🙏🏾 We got this Spiritual Warrior Goddesses 🎉

Excellent podcast show. I’m a 71 year old with 2 adults in their mid 30’s. I found the topic enlightening as well as helpful for me even now as I provide the support my children feel they need. My goal has always been for them to become independent. And I believe they are. I am intrigued on how I may practice reflecting the bothersome behavior of my children and others for healing my inner child. A grand journey indeed

Thank you dear Oprah for continuing to reach out to people and make these life transforming interviews and your daily insights available. You are such a bright light and a blessing in this world. As eternal Souls, when we all see each other back in Heaven, we will thank you again.

Very interesting. To this day I remember a time when I was small, playing outside of the apartment building where we lived. At some point my mom decided we’re going back inside, and I didn’t want to leave. Clearly I was stubborn and she might have had good reasons to decide we should go. I can recall that the situation escalated because I didn’t want to go, which made my mother angry, and at some point she was demanding that I listen to her and look at her when she speaks to me, I remember that at some point she reached for my chin to turn my head and make me look at her, for some reason this one time I really didn’t want to, and the last thing I could do, and I did was turn my eyes to the side, then she got really angry, somehow we got straight back home and the first thing she did is give me a beating with this thick black leather belt. ( belt that no one even wore, because it didn’t have a buckle, so to add to the absurdity of this memory, it must have been bought at some thrift store, solely for the purpose of disciplining me and my sisters.) To this day I can’t decide whether it is justifiable that my mother had to exercise authority, or like it is described in the interview, it was her own ego that lead her to get angry with me and punish me for simply not being ‘obiedent’

Authentic parenting is selfless, parents are stewards of children's spirit not owners ❤

Finally someone who thinks like I do. It’s been hard to raise my children with someone who thinks so differently. My ego aside bless us all.

This is such an important message. My heart breaks for all of the children out there who aren't valued and are parented by people who have no self awareness at all. And the children have no power, they just have to go along with what their parents say. Even parents who value their children overdo it, like the mother who sent in the question on this show about parenting the 17 year old. Oprah has always been a great advocate for children, our learning should never stop.

I agree that we should pay attention to so many things about ourselves, but especially our own world views.❤

After listening to her i bought all her books. Now reading it ang hopefully apply it.

Wow - the questions Dr. Shefali poses are awesome! We are a reflection of only ourselves, not our family or culture. Her description of social media and its effects on all of us should be highlighted everywhere: 23:36