how to process an emotion *life-changing tips from a therapy veteran*

Steps: 1. Acknowledge and name the emotion 2. Pause and notice - don't avoid emotion or use distractions 3. Sit in silence for 5 mins. 4. Reflect on your day 5 mins before sleep 5. Emotional chart- name the emotion 6. Don't justify your feeling 7. Moving forward- the feeling may come up again but it will less intensive every consecutive time. Feel empowered for acknowledging and resolving your feelings. Have an healthy coping mechanism: exercise/ journaling/ talking to therapist, partner, friend/ walking/ pursue hobby/ shower/sleep.

From the perspective of someone a little older, if you’re working on any of this stuff in your 20s, and think that you’re behind in any way, I definitely want to let you know that you absolutely are NOT. ❤ There are so many people who continually go throughout their lives never addressing this stuff, even though it massively affects both them, and how they interact with the world around them. They still just flatly refuse to go anywhere near the issue. I say all this to say, just working on these things at all, and especially at such a young age, is incredibly commendable. And, you’re actually quite ahead in life to be looking at them now, so you should definitely take pride in your self awareness and your decisions, because it is not easy.

I remember the first time I just let my anxiety course through me instead of trying to explain it or suppress it. I placed a hand on my chest and allowed my heart to beat rapidly until it finally calmed down. Afterward it was a lot easier to take myself out of anxiety spirals before they even started. In my childhood I was shamed for expressing distress despite it being an appropriate response to trauma I was experiencing. Being able to process negative emotions is essential for my mental wellbeing.

Emotional intelligence classes should be a thing. It’s even academically justifiable because it could get into other subjects like science, the arts, and business interpersonal skills.

I heard "you're too sensitive" my whole childhood from my family. It has definitely affected me my whole life.

I never really thought about how important knowing how to process emotions was. Society just expects people to know how to process emotions since they come up so naturally, and we are never explicitly taught how to do this. But the tips you provided just felt so helpful. Especially the one about reflecting on your day; there are just so many things going on in life that we never acknowledge, and they can wear us down without us knowing if we don't address them. I will definitely use some of these tips. Thank you!

i'm an avoidant attachment that never knew to process or talk about emotions properly, the skill just never came to me naturally. thank you so much for sharing ❤

FYI generally basic meditation practices ARE just sitting with your thoughts and emotions you're supposed to let whatever comes up come up. What's advised is to learn to pull your "mental spotlight" back a bit so rather than being trapped within those emotions you can... observe them from a distance. That does NOT mean not feeling them, but ultimately it's the reason for the concept of "not-self" or whatever, you are not your feelings because there isn't a you, not perceptually, just stuff that's happening and an observer. It's hard to explain but it DOES make this process easier.

the sitting for 5 minutes is pretty much medetation, you pay attention to what thoughts appear when you dont have anything distracting you from your emotions

The " best dad" shirt " set the tone of calnmness. 😅😄

commenting for the algorithm bc this was actually so helpful + practical! like people always say that you have to process your emotions & not avoid them in order to heal but i'm not sure i've ever heard anyone spell out exactly how to do that, or at least not in a way that's stuck with me. i think this video is one that i'll think of often moving forward :)

Everybody talk about processing emotions but nobody tells how to actually do it, its like they don't know it themselves and just repeats it, because its 'important'. Thank you so much for providing the knowledge to us! I wondered if you can heal yourself without therapy. I will make sure to follow what you've said in order to process my own trauma that i've been dealing with for a while and I acknowledged it but haven't done anything about it. Thanks again

Acknowledge and name the emotion (can take help from the emotions chart). Pause and notice if you're avoiding dealing with your feelings. Sit in silence with no distractions to hear your own thoughts. Reflect on your day. Receive positive validation. Don't justify your feelings. You will be triggered by trauma in the future but hopefully, the intensity reduces over time. Take steps to protect yourself from situations or people that keep triggering you Healthy coping mechanisms: mind is free but body is busy. Exercise, journal, craft, walk without distractions, cleaning, shower, sleep.

I'm glad that I already think these ways. I dont have any trauma. I just stress too much. But lately, I've been taking care of myself more and the effects are positive. I take some walks by myself, watch the landscape, people and nature then do some sport once a week(the walk alone is once per week. For sport, its 5 days a week. I swear, sport helps alot in many ways). Whenever I fail a test, (which happened in one of the 4 tests we had today(Im in 10th grade Im 15 years old rn)) I used to cry just after it. But now, I just think its in the past and think about how to compensate the bad grade. Because, what else can be done, the bad has already happened I cant go back. I also had to deal with "love" emotions that made my heart go up and down the cliff. I'm still a bit hurt but time is healing it. (And the punches I give to my punching bag). But smtg is still annoying me cause I only think about the same things for HOURS.😮‍💨 But "thanks" to my 7 hours of classes per day I sometimes have to think so much that I forget those annoying other thoughts.(Im in french system. I pray for those who are in asian systems like Korea, Japan and China. You guys are tought and I respect all the people who've done it that far in these systems) Its the 1st time I write such a long text. Srry bout that. I hope yall can get throught what you want to overcome. Im sure all of you have bigger problems thand I do. I wish I could share my luck with the most unlucky ones. I send good energies to you. And dont forget: nothing is impossible. I was once unable to do one correct push-up... now I can do 10!! 😂 small improvements should always be seen as a victory, u should think the same too! It might help🤷‍♀️ Bye-bye☆

Subscribed. I've had over 20 years of trauma thanks to my family; and even though i go for therapy, I've realised there's so much self work to be done. I have no idea what emotions I feel (my go-to is any kind of distraction) because I didn't have the space to emote as a child. Thank you for this video. This is just the beginning of my journey.

8:41 hit me. I constantly feel that im always in the wrong for setting boundaries. And its been hard to regulate my emotions. Thus video is God sent. Thanks sm.

OMG i have been in therapy for 10 years with cptsd and this has been the most helpful thing anyone has told me so far. I have been asking how to process emotions for years and no therapist has answered that question, nor have I seen this online. No one tells you HOW. THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!!!!!!

I've always had to conceal my emotions when I'm around people and smile like a jooly fellow. When i react or act different, people ask me why I'm being moody or I indirectly wasn't acting as strong or as happy as they expect me to be. And when i get angry it's so hard to let go of, i don't have anger issues but i just can't forget the anger when someone cuts me off from their life because i think deep down I'm hurt about. I'll definitely download this video, thank you.

To anyone who is passing by, I need some advice. Here is my story. I'm going through a lot of things recently. First off, I've always been social anxiety and a stutterer my whole life, and I didn't face it until recently. I started to show up for myself, like I'm trying to speak my mind and express my feelings more even if I might stutter on some words. I'm trying to face the fear of being judged. Secondly, I was hit by lazy eye, so I was going to the hospital to train my eye muscles and was looking for a job at the same time, and this week, I just got a job offer so I'm being worried if I can wear an eye patch to work because my doctor said I have to cover my bad eye for months until my eye muscles can get stronger. I don't know how to process these feelings. It's like something in my life got better and worse at the same time. I guess this is the fear of change and fear of being judged.

Wow wow wow!!! It’s almost as though you just rifled through my journal. A journal which only came into existence when I started to realise that I wasn’t processing my emotions properly. Processing is such a key and fundamental word and I, like you, came to the realisation through learning from my own experiences and reflecting. Can’t even tell you how much good this entire thing has done my mind and body and will continue to. My one piece of advice would be for everyone to remember that you’re not going to be brilliant at processing your emotions straight away. It isn’t a magic fix, but a journey. You’ll ‘back-slide’ and have times (that may be a day, it may be a month, or longer) you go through without processing your emotions properly. But that’s okay. It’s part of it. And once you identify it, it just goes to show that you’ve made progress. Each time, you’ll get better at identifying things and these emotions will not become less, or non-existent, but you will be better equipped to handle them each time.