If Republicans Said the Quiet Parts Loud About Taylor Swift

Over the last eight years I have come to the conclusion that the GOP could just talk to their base exactly like this and it wouldn't change anything.

You left out the one, big "quiet part out loud" reason that the MAGA movement REALLY hates Taylor Swift: It isn't that she might officially endorse President Biden in particular or Democrats in general. Nor is it that Taylor Swift might take a public stand on any particular issue, much less eventually decide to run for office, herself. The real reason I think they fear her is that she's encouraging her fans (as well as anyone who will listen) to register to vote, and actually show up and participate on election day. Republican strategists have always been worried about massive voter turnouts as these tend to favor the Democrats. This is why voter suppression was a big part of the GOP's "Southern Strategy" devised by Roger Stone, Paul Manafort, and Lee Atwater. Simply by encouraging participation in the electoral process, Taylor Swift could be a real game-changer . . . . 400th like.

You left out this… those same conservative men who are getting mad about women watching “their” sports also tend to complain about those same women “getting mad at men for watching the sports and not paying attention to them.” It’s so pathetic.

"The parts of speech are coming to get you!" OMG, they'll cut off my dangling participles!

"When you are angry and afraid, who are you gonna vote for?" Ghostbusters!

My favorite was the claim that she’s only dating him to get his $70k bonus for herself.

The scarry part is that most real life Republicans are even more cartoony evil than the one you played - great video.

Imagine being constantly angry and afraid of things that aren’t even real, just made up for the explicit purpose of making you angry and afraid. It’s like watching a zombie movie and then living the rest of your life as if zombie hordes are just around the corner. Meanwhile, you live in the most privileged time and place in history, surrounded by things that provide for your needs and desires, and can’t enjoy a damn thing.

We're men, strong men, manly men, We're men in tights, TIGHT tights.

As a Spanish, I find the whole "issue" about Taylor Swift extremely crazy. What do American conservatives smoke or drink or inhale to be so nuts?

Missed the part where they all liked her back when they thought she was the epitome of arian perfection, and because she kept quiet about her politics, it meant she was secretly one of them. When she finally went public about her political beliefs, they all felt betrayed, which is when all of the conspiracy theories started, because they couldn't handle the idea that their perfect woman wasn't on their team.

Wait. I thought these right wingers swore to boycott the NFL because of Colin Kaepernick having the audacity to exercise his 1st amendment rights.

Conservatives have a long and storied history of manipulating resentment of popular youth culture, specifically musicians the kids like, to get the old farts who are angry that music isn’t like it was in their day to vote for them. It’s why they panicked about Elvis’s hips, why they freaked out when John Lennon correctly pointed out that The Beatles were more popular than Jesus, it’s why they raged against rap music for decades. And it’s why they’re attacking Taylor Swift now. Banking on elder resentment towards stuff the kids like.

"'Can't we have anything to ourselves?' You ask in the petulant tone of a child discovering they have the same birthday as another kid in their kindergarten class."

I'm an old Boomer. As far as I know I have never heard any of her music and I doubt I could pick her out in a crowded room. There is one thing I do know. All my life what conservative's picture in their minds when thinking about "true love and romance" is the football player and the cheerleader. Now, because some guy facing a lot of legal issues tells them that it's not a good thing, they're against 'the Football player and the Cheerleader'? This sounds just like the border. It's the "#1 threat to our national security" and things need to be done about it TODAY or our nation will fail but, it's better for HIM if we don't do anything about it.

I'm 100% certain that this exact speech would win you the Republican nomination in any district in the country. Sad, but certain.

The other day I had to listen to someone rant about this at work. How he thinks they're rigging it to get the Chiefs to the Super Bowl. Low key suggesting the 'great replacement theory' may not be a conspiracy theory afterall and that they're doing that to football to bring in new fans to replace a shrinking nfl fanbase. That Taylor Swift has no talent and that 'unlike the Beatles, nobody will know who she is in 200 years.' All because...what, 20 seconds or so of her being on screen during an hours long football game? Because she's trying to get people to vote? Because she might endorse the candidate they don't like?

"I am the shadow you have cast upon yourselves" is the most metal thing you've ever said in one of these

Do they even try and have a quiet part? Seems like you can't shut them up.

We live in the weirdest timeline 🤦🏼‍♀️