Restaurants That Should Be Shut Down - Cyanide & Happiness Compilation

His ability to contort a cop with his clothes on while keeping him alive is extremely impressive

The original "Le Telepathé" came out when I was a freshman in college. My friends and I used to absolutely lose our shit at the way the waiter said "dicks." I'm currently in a hotel on a business trip and the people in the room next to me banged on the wall because I laughed way louder at that scene than anyone would consider acceptable.

Reason for an F: -Milk left out at room temperature for undisclosed period of time -Glass placed casually on non-work surface (introducing bacteria) -Eggs shot which would introduce two kinds of contaminants (broken shell, possible gunpowder. If the bullets are lead there's 3 contaminants) -Pancake batter stirred by spurs in close contact with the floor -Sausages placed on a non-work surface where outside contaminants are present (to make a violin play you need to rosin the bow. Rosin is a sap based or synthetic substance that would melt and contaminate the sausages as they cook) -Improperly cooked sausages (cannot confirm proper internal temperature of sausages cooked on violin, likely uneven cooking given surface area of the strings) -Orange Juice introduced to bacteria laden area while prepping (inside of boot is sweaty, juicing by foot adds more sweat and likely bacteria) -The toaster hat might be ok -Stovetop-belt buckle and fire aparatus in close proximity to genitals, health risk to self and bacterial risk to customers unless regularly removed and washed -Catching everything in close proximity to the anus (regardless of how you scrub that entire cooking sequence was spent in his pants so sweat and darkness which allow fecal and other bacteria to thrive) -Fart blowing millions of unseen bacteria over all the food and counter (this plate and anything that touches that counter are now infected with human fecal bacteria. Aka toxic waste and a MAJOR health risk). -I noticed he didnt wash his hands at any time during this video despite having touched an outside appliance (radio) likely covered in bacteria -No gloves/touched raw sausage then failed to wash hands (cross contamination) -No signs saying employees must wash hands -No properly labelled handwashing stations -Work surfaces aren't food grade approved material -No sign of sanitizing station or hand-mixed santizer -no MSDS in sight -I didnt see a single trash can so proper disposal of trash/contaminated materials is absent

The way the waiter says “Diiiiiiiiiiiiicks” always gets me

Poor guy poured his heart into that breakfast.

“Look we are a classy establishment we got class comin’ out the ass” Got me laughing for hours 😂

"We cannot just replace the DiiiiCKksS you ordered because you've changed your mind" 🧐 This gets me everytime! LOL

Le telepathlé Was HILARIOUS

The "No" for breakfast cowboy gets me everytime.

0:38 ok but how is no one questioning the fact he didn’t burn his hand on something that cooks raw sausage in 4 seconds

He threw three eggs and fired three shots, but only two eggs ever came back down.

“Get the F*ck out of here, and get the f*ck in here!” - Best quote 2022 now bro

Lol the tons of bugs running out of the sandwich is just funny AF and he literally ate it still

10:35 “We can not just replace the DICKS just because you changed your mind” This will always be one of my favorite lines in all of Cyanide and Happiness

The waiter saying "DIEEECKSSS" lives rent free in my head

Wait wait wait a second. Since when do humans in that universe have full legs instead of black stilts?

The Salt one still gets me everytime

The Télépathé is still one of the best C&H episode

Le Telepathé sounds amazing and probably expensive

Le Telepathe would be the best, best that it can never be shut down.