How do I keep going when I feel like giving up? | ep.217

Hi Kati, I love your content! Could you consider having your editors add chapters to the YouTube podcasts? This way, one could easily jump to the question(s) they’re most interested in. I don’t always have the luxury of listening to the entire episode in one sitting. Thanks!

Small token of appreciation for your hard work and love. I know it's not much. I got your book Traumatized as a gift from my sister. ❤❤

As someone who graduated with a BS in psychology and is now a year into grad school for social work, I felt question 3 in my soul. I just started therapy last week for the first time and I straight up told her that I know what’s wrong with me, why it’s happening, what caused it, etc. but it doesn’t mean that I can fix it by myself. (I also have a hard time letting myself feel emotions). I’ve been a silent watcher of your videos for about 9 years now and thought I would finally pop in! P.S. You were part of the reason I chose this career and I absolutely love it! Thank you for all you do 🫶

Just read the video title… to all out there who fight against suicide thought. Don’t give up. Scream for help. Ive been living with these thoughts every day for the last 2 years. But I will keep fighting and I promise you it will get better ❤️ much love to you!

I really like the name Glimmers. I keep an annual jar of glimmers written on slips of paper and folded. At the end of the year I pull them out and read them. Then I keep them in an envelope and start the jar for the new year.

What motivates me to get through the hard days and challenges is my cats they provide me with tons of love and support plus it's expensive to take care of my fur babies.

I always feel like giving up. The only reason I exist is because I’m afraid of going to hell if I made myself be dead.

I sometimes struggle waiting while the phone is ringing too. I always thought this was just a “me” thing. It’s nice to know I’m not alone and that there are strategies to put in place! Thank you for the amazing and needed work on your channel, Kati. It’s appreciated!

Thank you. 💝 Your video clarified for me with great description, my past experiences. I am 79 years old and have not allowed myself to change and create a better life for myself. This includes being present and emotionally available to anyone in my life, especially to those who want me to be in their lives who accept me as I am. I have acceptance for all that was and is. However, I still live with shame , blaming myself for just about , "everything." "True" feelings started coming up around 3 years ago. I spent the next 2 years intellectualizing the who, what, when, where, why, etc. of my life. I still have not allowed myself to move into the many somatic and spiritual practices available , aware of since 60's thru today.

I asked the first question and I truly thank you and appreciate you for your thoughtful answer. Extremely helpful. And you were spot on with mentioning the need for routine and how I hate last minute plans and just generally like things to be in order and predictable. Trauma is a wild beast. It’s crazy to think I rarely even considered it as a thing that existed before I got into therapy. It’s been such a journey to go from “I’m just a broken fucked up not-even-human being” to “I’m a human who has worked so hard to survive and create a safe life for herself.” And it’s even wilder that it’s a constant battle to not give up and retreat back into old ways where it’s ultimately unsafe and unhealthy but comfortable. Anyway, I’m just reflecting because your answer really did help further my process. You’re so skilled! Thank you Kati. ❤️

I'm grateful for Kati

I am so BURNED OUT from trying to get myself better. 8 years of antidepressants, therapy (CBT included), I just finished 6 months of excellent inpatient in a Anxiety, Personality Disorders and Eating Disorders clinic... It was supposed to be IT. But I left, having a hard time adjusting - my old life doesn't seem to "fit" anymore, there isn't a new one yet. My relationship is falling apart (we are long-distance, I'm having a hard time with convincing myself to move to him to the US from Europe), my job doesn't provide fulfillment anymore... I am scrambling, every day is a serious struggle. I've been with my parents for the past 2 weeks because I wasn't able to function by myself. I question my whole being, my whole life. I feel so empty inside. My partner was supposed to be my safety, but that doesn't seem to be there anymore too (there was an incident of emotional infidelity) - the relationship feels so different, I don't even know what it is anymore. I don't know who I am.

Thank you so much for taking the time to make this video It really has helped and been informative❤

Katie, I have been in the position the person was in who was talking about giving up, and I really think your advice is short sighted. If they have tried everything in the psychology world, they probably need to look elsewhere. Philosophy, spirituality, etc. That is what I had to do. Therapy and meds cant fix the problem if the patient is driving themselves into the ground.

I love EMDR, it has really helped my depression! It can be used for alot of things that you are stuck on, or to help where other therapies dont seem to work.

I loved that section on knowing vs understanding and feeling emotions. I have a metaphor. Knowing or intellectualizing emotions is like watching a cell phone video of a concert or fireworks, feeling emotions is like feeling the bass or heat from the fireballs pass over the surfaces of your skin. I feel like this has been the reason Awe as an emotion has been so useful for me in terms of overcoming intellectualization. For me it is a nucleation point for feeling the rest.

Hi Kati, thank you for all you do and the authentic way you do it. I am currently housebound I am a Ukraine vet and also a child abuse surviver I have some form of undiagnosed colitis. I have begged for help from my GP and MHS in the UK but our NHS is broken leaving me in a complete mess I can't sleep either nightmares or pain keep me awake most nights. I have stopped eating because the pain is better than the flashbacks' intrusive memories suicidal thoughts and guilt shame in leaving my wife alone. I wanted to take my life but was prevented by emergency services. I don't know how to explain to my wife that I'm stopping eating until the end, I would rather have a month or two left without reliving some horrific flashbacks. Starvation is the only power I have left and it gives me some peace knowing the end is near, sorry for the nature of my message it's taken me hrs to write this to make it as acceptable as possible while remaining true

Its really as simple as this; dont question your existence, and dont lose faith.

Medication is taken to help with the feelings we have, it doesn't change anything and it doesn't take away the trauma. Let's get to the point where we're okay with our trauma and be okay with ourselves and the situation we find ourselves. Good luck everybody! Take back the power in your life.

My ailing parents. Already see the impending doom. Have no idea how can move on without them. Money is not a problem. But the grief setting in is insufferable. Am planning a self-burial in the sea when they are no more. I am creative enough. But after seeing the movie MARTIN EDEN I find no meaning of getting along with life without any of my parents. I love them too much to live without them. Am 42. An author and an artist.