Autism and Relationships Part 2: Romantic Relationships | AUTISM IN GIRLS

i really appreciate that you mentioned how we can be mistaken for narcissists (especially since public interest in narcissists has seemingly grown in recent years). i wanna scream "i promise i actually do love and care for you i just dont know how to show it all the time!!!" lol

OMG.I HAD THE SAME EXACT THING OF BEING DISGUSTED BY PEOPLE WHEN I REALIZED THEY LIKED ME. I thought I was the only one!!! I didn’t date until I was 21. I’m having an assessment in August.

My husband and I have separate bedrooms and I LOVE it. I’m undiagnosed but definitely autie. We can visit each other when cuddles are needed 😍👍

The point about feeling gross about someone liking you back was interesting. I relate in a backwards way, where often someone I hadn't really noticed or had just met would be flirty and would show interest. I would get really shy and be creeped out by it. Then after they've moved on and quit expressing interest in me, I'd suddenly start to get a crush on the person - but by then it was too late.

You're just me. You're literally me, and it makes me so happy that I'm not just out here floating lol. Thank you for sharing!!

I 100% get that about the feeling switch when you find out they like you. Even about the sexual stuff, it's not that I'm repulsed by it but I sometimes just forget it exists and my bf has a pretty high sex drive so sometimes I offend him (sort of? he finds it funny but I still worry he's actually offended sometimes) when I'm like "oh you want sex?" because I just thought we were hanging out and I missed all of his signals to move things along haha

I'm autistic and realized pretty recently that most of my repulsion in relationships from touch and from reciprocated feelings actually stemmed from me Not being interested in men!! Obviously could also be an autism thing as seen by lots of the comments, but sometimes a good look inward might reveal something else!! I was always super comfortable in relationships with men if there was no pressure to have sex and we could just remain friends that lived together, but I have actual romantic desires with women!

I felt the same way about the kid thing. My hubby and I have 3 kiddos. And I got Sooo lucky! My kids have always been quiet and understanding. I 💯 can NOT deal with other peoples children though.lol. I'm 41, and have a 20yo,19yo & 16yo. My oldest son & daughter are both out of the house now & active military hundreds of miles away. Kids are alot like clay. While u have to let thier personalities shine. They are good at molding and adapting to the home environment they have. Like I said Noise, especially multiple noise simultaneously(like TV going , kids toys and conversations at the same time) is a HUGE trigger for me. My kids adapted to quiet play very young and were great sleepers even as babies. But, it's an individuals choice whether mother/fatherhood is right 4 them. So, I respect your choices whatever they are.

I'm having my assessment next week (I'm 24), and I wanted to thank you for sharing your experiences! I've always seen myself as some strange kind of monster because of things like needing my space so badly, being anxious about new things / emotional proximity, and my feelings vanishing when someone liked me back. It gives me hope to see that you made it work.

Alex is awesome and seems to have his stuff together. It was great to "meet" him.

I was so anxious to hear what your thoughts were about children. I wasn’t surprised when you said you didn’t want any or couldn’t stand their crying. This is exactly how my family member feels.

Thank you both for this vid. My son, Alex, is in a relationship with a woman w autism, and i found this to be a comfort to ME, surprisingly. I know that he TRULY loves her and that she loves him, too...even when she cant show it.

Funny to hear you talk about the idea of having separate houses in a marriage or romantic relationship, because that has always been my ideal.

I'm asexual and it was really hard for me to do sexual stuff with my boyfriend first. I was very afraid and a bit repulsed by those things. Luckily my bf didn't pressure me to do anything and let me decide when we do what. I think it took me ~9 months to feel finally ready. I just thought regularly about sexual situations and me in it, which was kinda gross to me at first but somewhere along they way I kinda got used to it and got more comfortable with it so I guessed why not try it one time. Now I even like to do sexual stuff with him, what really surprised me. Just wanted to share this, maybe it helps someone who deals with similar things :)

My husband is NT, laid back, and the complete opposite of me as well! Our wedding anniversary is actually tomorrow! Thank you for sharing this video I appreciate how honest you are and I completely relate to many things you mentioned. Thank you Alex for joining! My husband plays video games too!

I have 2 kids! autistic and everything you said I related to. to the tee sensory issues. i wear noise cancelling earmuffs when there having temper tantrums. helps a lot. i over heat and temp is another issue and touch is a lot when I'm overwhelmed. i have a fan. I'm working on knowing when I'm spinning out and ways to combat it but I'm lucky enough my fiance can catch me too and help me before it happens. there's moment when I need a breather but I've worked out ways around the kids ! thought id be the 40 yr old single aunt w/ no kids 4 yrs ago! crazy how quickly things changed but its also completely normal to not want kids. i have a friend who wont even hold my kids. or be alone with them. she freaks out when I go to the bathroom. everyone's got their own thing! just have to respect each other! <3 thanks for the video definitely showing it too the man!

This is so empowering. In 2014, I was in a relationship once with an autistic person, which sadly didn’t go well. Yes a lot has changed since then. Having your boyfriend come on the video for a little Q&A has given me some helpful tools to keep in mind. You are very lucky to be with someone who will be a part of your autism journey and will flow with your learning differences when the adaptation happens and seven years or more can be rare. Wishing you and Alex much happiness in the coming years.

Alex looked so relieved when the filming finally ended. :)

Truly appreciate the candor and humor you bring to this video. You are an adorable couple....

Yes! It's so nice to hear someone else talk about the weird repulsion thing!! I could feel very strong feelings for someone but once it was reciprocated it was like a nightmare scenario for my brain and I've still never understood why. Part of me thinks it's an attachment trauma issue but I'm not sure!