DSM-5 Autism Criteria | How to Make Your Case for a Diagnosis

The toll of decades of forced coping and trying to be more “ normal” is exhausting and comes with compounding anxiety. One thing I’ve faced is neurotypicals not understanding why I would want a diagnosis now when I seemed to have done so well all these years. I wanna scream, “I’m not doing well. I’m tired.” They don’t see and, I think, can’t comprehend the extent of our struggle just to make it through a simple conversation and why if you interrupt my routines I nearly lose it.

I'm both crying and laughing while listening to you giving your own definition of autism. It's like you're describing me. I'm currently 31 years old, and have only just figured out that I could be on the spectrum. That whole diagnosis journey is still ahead of me, and it's both fascinating and terrifyingly stressful.

9:22 - So apparently this bit doesn't necessarily mean "isn't imaginative" (though it could) but rather "has trouble doing imaginative stuff collaboratively". That is VERY much my experience! I have a really active imagination individually, but I could never "play pretend" with other kids bc the elements they would introduce were just too chaotic - they broke the internal rules of the story and I couldn't deal with it! Likewise, I HATE that game where you go around in a circle and each person adds one sentence to the story.

I've never heard someone say that about eye contact before but that's exactly what I do! Well actually I watch people's mouths, I worked out that it gives the impression of eye contact and I go between looking around the room and looking at their mouth when I remember I should check in or seem interested. It was amazing to me to learn that other people aren't making these conscious calculations and efforts during social interactions, no wonder I find it so exhausting. I also wont be able to hear what they're saying if I make eye contact, it feels deeply uncomfortable and my brain turns to white noise and panic.

Stuff like buying (and receiving) cards and gifts for people stresses me out IMMENSELY. I have a big extended family and I could never figure who should get a gift and/or card from me or not, how expensive, how often, can it be a gift card, can I request a list of gifts that are acceptable, do I have to coordinate so that I don't buy the same thing as someone else etc etc. I would inevitably get something wrong and feel bad 😞 I never realised this is an autistic trait, not me being stupid or lazy

I am 45, and was recently diagnosed with high functioning autism. I always knew I was different and didn’t learn like others. College allowed me to learn like I needed to. I could just go to class and go home and study. I lived alone for 4 years and it was what I needed. Completely quiet and by myself. As I start understanding my diagnosis, my life is starting to make sense!

I’m autistic and love imagination, it’s my escape from a world I don’t belong in.

I am going through the process myself (at age 41), and today I am finally going in for my evaluation. I am kinda nervous, but at the same time a little excited to (hopefully) finally have some answers.

I just realized about 5 years ago that I actually don't make eye contact. My coworkers would glance over their shoulder when I was talking to them, I always thought that was weird. Finally someone asked me what I was looking at, and I realized I was looking past their face and over their shoulder when I'm talking, or look around the room. When someone is talking to me, I'm looking at their lips. It helps me concentrate on what they're saying, one reason I have a hard time on the phone I think

I never considered autism for myself, but after watching “love on the spectrum” and noticing several similarities between myself and some of the individuals on the show, I became obsessed. After finding your channel, and hearing about your experiences, etc. I’m sure that I am on the spectrum. I have the start of my assessment coming up!

Hi Tay I just found your channel! Awesome! I am 62 and was diagnosed with ADHD at 12. Then it was from DSM2 I think and called hyperkinetic disorder. Zoom ahead to last year and I discovered I was on the spectrum. I have a nephew who is autistic and I began to do research to understand his condition and I found out I was reading about me! I have always felt like I was an alien even with the ADHD diagnoses and suddenly I was not alone! I have been fiercely studying and learning about ASD for the last year. Channels like yours are so important! Thank you for posting and I am excited to catch up on all of your videos! ASD has become my latest “Special interest.”

I just found your channel a few days ago through the Youtube algorithm. I never thought that I might be on the spectrum. I'm still not sure that I am. I feel that I'm not "normal" enough to be classified as neurotypical, but neither do I feel that I am "autistic enough" to classified as a person on the spectrum. I have had issues with social interaction with people all my life. When I was a kid or teenager, every friend I had abandonded me eventually except for one. One of them said outright that I was too boring of a person to be around. I never fit in with groups and have always preferred one on one social interaction. I have always spent abnormally large amounts of time alone, as social interaction wears me out. My biggest issue is that I think I have been masking for such an enormous portion of my life that I don't know which part of me is the masking behaviour and which is the real me. Masking is also what has made social interaction so draining for me. It's hard work not being yourself! But I'm wondering if non autistic people mask as well, as I don't know if I'm "autistic enough". I hope no one takes offense for my use of the term "autistic enough". It's probably just me still having this stereotypical outlook on what autism is. But I do wonder where the line is drawn between a neurotypical and an autistic person. Maybe I'm just right on the border and that's why I'm so confused. Sorry about this rambling comment. I want to thank you Tay for your channel and your videos. Keep up the good work, you are doing something really important!

From a neurotypical... thank you so much for explaining all this! It has helped me better understand and validate why my husband is the way he is. I have struggled in our marriage for over 40 yrs. Hopefully, this info will also help him understand himself better. Thank you, again!

When I was a lad, my mum always used to say " Looking people in the eyes is a sign of honesty which represents you've nothing to hide " She never understood why I wasn't able to do it and ''tis true, people sometimes might be under the impression of talking to a wall 'cause my mind is daydreaming or travelling in a "parallel universe" :). My imagination is like a stream of consciousness that flows freely ,Great video and thanks for the colossal mission you've been carrying out. In those tough periods you're a beacon of light to many .

Your point on imaginative play got me thinking. I'm also autistic and when I was in elementary school, I read very well but could not retain what I'd read. It didn't matter the genre; I would almost instantly forget and the homework that was required for what we read made this even harder. It was especially difficult in a group/classroom setting. I experienced intense social anxiety in that type of environment. There was an added pressure I felt to be "smart" like the others. Thankfully I had amazing teachers and other helpers in the school who took their time with me. I ended up in a reading course that was one-on-one where I did different mind exercises as well. I learn best and feel most comfortable with one-on-one learning. The biggest takeaway from this experience was the instructor telling me to picture a movie as I'm reading. Though this took some time, that changed everything for me. I have always been a very creatively imaginative person with a whole inner world and, once I was able to retain textual information, it bolstered my creativity even further. I am so grateful for the adults who believed in and helped me. Without their patience and compassion, I can't (ironally enough) picture who I would've become. Thank you for sharing your own personal journey with us.

It's good to encounter someone else with autism who loves to read but basically only reads nonfiction. I frequently have a book with me so I read it whenever I'm waiting, when eating alone, etc. People occasionally ask what I'm reading, expecting to hear about some novel and/or author they're at least vaguely aware of, and when I tell them what the book is about they usually recoil a little in confusion.

I didn't realize I had so many repetitive behaviors. I knew I had extreme problems adjusting to new circumstances and changes, even when I knew the changes were good and I was excited about them. It's almost like consciously I was happy about them, but, unconsciously, my nervous system acted like it was the end of the world. If the changes involved an increase in social interaction and noise, it made things very bad for me. However, sometimes the changes were good and I had no problem. I just moved to a new place that was super quiet where I was at the end of the building away from most other apartments. It was such a better environment than my old place that I haven't had any issues after moving there.

I do enjoy reading fiction, particularly children's books like Harry Potter or His Dark Materials. I have to hide away in my bedroom for hours to read those; I never want to read on the train or wherever other things are going on around me. I definitely like routine and don't like changes. Unknown or crowded places make me feel anxious.

I first started trying to find out more about autism because a friend has two autistic children. The first time I saw one of your videos, I realized that I am probably autistic too. Thank you so much for what you are doing!

Thank you for all of this information. I'm going to share it with my mom, who led me to believe that she finds it impossible that I could be on the autism spectrum. I've never mentioned it to her before, for fear of the exact reaction I did get from her. Her comments have always been, "Well, I have a hard time being in front of people too." Or, "I think everyone has a little bit of that in them." Completely minimizing my feelings & the conversations I've tried to have with her. I am now 54 & she is 80. So I get with her age, that she has the old school way of thinking. She knows I have struggled my entire life with anxiety! Yet, she ALWAYS blames it in my weight! She can't, for the life of me, understand that, MAYBE my weight became an issue because of all the mental problems I had & have! It's so hurtful not to have family who believes in & supports you. My daughter, who has recently been diagnosed with ptsd, adhd, and asd, wants me to get help, like she has. My husband hates the labels. I'll say, "That's the Autism honey. " And he shakes his head as he's walking off. I'm learning that soooo many things about myself have, in fact, been autism, adhd, ocd, etc. So many light bulbs have been going off within myself since my daughter has been diagnosed. My parents put me in counseling when I was 15 because they thought I was a defiant child. Not that there could actually be something mentally wrong with me. As old as I am, it still breaks my heart that no one supports me, except for my 33 year old daughter! 💔 😢 I have never been able to have a normal life. Dropping out of high school when I was 15. Never feeling like I fit in, anywhere. My fingernails are down to my cuticles. I'm 100 lbs overweight. I don't know how to have normal conversations with people. Pretty much everything you were saying about yourself in social situations is me to a T. Yet, I feel like no one understands me. 😭