The 4 Types Of Guys That Will LOVE BOMB You! | Matthew Hussey

The biggest coward of a man is one who opens a woman's heart to love without any intention of giving it... Bob Marley

After dating a narcissist, any signs of love bombing have me running for the hills!

Men on the rebound love bomb hard too. That’s how I learned to stay away from guys right out of a relationship NO MATTER what they say. They lie to themselves then lie to you about what they’re looking for. Just a warm feeling to validate them. But they know in order to get that feeling from you they have to give it to you. Be safe y’all

We have to STOP getting attached unless they commit and want an exclusive relationship and claim us. Treat them like a friend until they man up and express they want a real relationship. Words mean NOTHING... watch their actions.

Omg this is literally what just happened to me. Tons of compliments, intense, pouring feelings out to me, it felt like such a deep immense connection. And that just like that, done. It’s hurt me so deeply, even though it didn’t last very long. One things for sure, he lost an amazing woman

It's not just about validation, it's about control. Once you've fallen in love with them, they know they have you hooked. And when you're hooked, you're easier to control. Once you're hooked, you're more likely to ignore all their other red flags and let them get away with awful behaviour and awful treatment of you. It's bait and switch.

Guard your heart. Take your time. Get to know someone as friends first. Trust in Gods timing.

A while back, I lived something similar. I met this guy, we decided to be FWBs. After a while, he started to tell me he was in love, wanted me to meet his daughter, be part of his life. Slowly but surely, I came to agree, thinking, why not. As soon as I said that, he disappeared. After 5 weeks of silence (am busy and patient), I reached out to see if we could meet. He responded we were just FWBs, and that he did not have time. I responded, OK, I will not bother you in the future. I moved on and 2 months later, he got back in touch, saying he regretted, missed me and was really keen to see me again. He still is waiting for my answer. Once they take advantage once, never let them do it again.

This makes so much sense. People who love bomb want something out of you quicker than those who want healthy, sustainable relationships. The love bombing is like a hook with a shiny bait to reel you in as quickly as possible. Someone looking for something real and sustainable won't go rushing in (hopefully). Sometimes we fall in love with how the person makes us feel. So we could actually be in love with the experience they gave us, not the essence of the person. Always good to stay grounded by knowing who you are and what you want (your values) and being aware. And time always REVEAL people and their true intentions.

What I find very difficult is that after being love bombed, there is a certain period of time after that where it's difficult, while meeting new people, trying new relationships, because the "high" of love bombing make seem the normal pace tasteless. It takes time to see that while it's less intense, it's also probably more stable, persistent and sane.

The love bombing can also be part of the “pursue and panic” pattern that a man with an intimacy conflict has. They really want intimacy and they come on strong initially until they panic when their wounds get triggered, which is inevitable in intimate relationships. These can be some of the saddest missed connections because the person often has a good heart but no awareness of their unresolved traumas so nothing can change. The relationship becomes agonizing and impossible due to the paralyzing ambivalence. These are often the guys that women can’t let go of, painfully, for years. There’s a fantastic book on this topic called “He’s Scared She’s Scared”. When we discover we are holding on to men who pursue and panic, it usually means we need to look inside and notice our own intimacy conflicts. It’s humbling to realize I chose that because it felt safe at a subconscious level. It was an impossible relationship and the fantasy of a relationship instead of real intimacy because in the unresolved past, intimacy was associated with feeling unsafe. So when we keep choosing men like that (or holding on to an impossible connection like that) it means we need to examine the parts of ourselves that are avoiding intimacy due to unresolved relational trauma.

Points to be noted: 📝1. Measure consistency over intensity 📝2. Love is something that grows 📝3. Stuff that is big deal to you doesn't mean the same thing to other person ✨MEASURE CONSISTENCY OVER INTENSITY✨Wow, absolutely wow, that just hit my spirit.! Stay away from 🎇'fireworks'🎆 they explode with great light & sound that eventually quickly draws your attention, and then they vanish quickly! Thanks Mr. Matthew for sharing your knowledge.💙💫✨

Some people are more likely to be taken advantage of by love bombing types because of the lack of love/affection in their childhood. When a child grows up in the cold (abuse or neglect) love bombers feel so warm. It’ll take work to unravel the damage done from these types of childhood experiences.

A friend of the family who is a licensed clinical social worker, a psychotherapist, once told me that relationships that start off explosive, majority of them do not last. She said almost exactly what Matthew said. She said healthy long lasting relationships take time to build. I've held onto that bit of info for a long time.

9 things to quit for all Strong Women: 1. Caring about what others think 2. Not believing in yourself 3. Not experimenting different ideas / solutions for problems (life&business) 4. Not prioritizing your health 5. Wasting your precious time 6. Wanting something (instead write a plan and work towards it) 7. Chasing meaningless relationships 8. Wasting time by scrolling social media 9. Quitting addictions for good (if you have any — consider stopping it as it makes you mentally weak + affects your confidence and all other areas of your life!) 🚀 Take it easy and I hope you found one thing helpful in this list.

1. Narcissist 2. Dismissive Avoidant Relationship Style -fear of intimacy but wants it 3. Anxious Attachment Style -more codependent and feels they need another person to fill the painful void

Moral compass. A lot of people really don’t have this which is disappointing.

Last year I got love bombed by a guy and I fell for his manipulation. He got what he wanted and quickly ghosted me and moved onto the next girl. The worst part was he not only love bombed me, but didn’t disclose that he has herpes and he transmitted the disease to me. Learned my lesson the hard way.

Ghosting is the new favourite way of dating. It seems that there are only narcissists out there.

I call guys like this "Fireworks" because fireworks are all splendour and amazement in the beginning, you give them all your attention - then in no time at all, they disappear without a trace (or breadcrumb you out of existence: eventually non-committal, daily morning calls and video chats stop, and it takes over a day to respond to a Whatsapp, despite them appearing "online" and still "liking" your social media posts)